Sakura Akatsuki
by The Jashinist and Peeves
Summary: It was noted for the longest time that the Akatsuki needed a new medic. But who they choose... Well that's the problem.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1: Kumo no Dei Ara

_Hi peoples! This is my first fanfic, so please, be nice! Just a few notes before starting: The first is about the translations. The title of this story, Sakura Akatsuki, translates to 'Cherry blossom Dawn.' The other note on translation is the chapter title. Kumo no Dei Ara was originally Kumo no Deidara, but I changed it to fit the literal translation, Cloud of Day Flaw, I have no idea what of is in Japanese, so I just used no, it's kind of like of. Also, techniques: Jouton=Steam Release (Tori's kekkei genkai), Bakuton=Explosive Release (Deidara's kekkei genkai), Jinton=Dust Release (Gina's kekkei genkai, also the Second and Third Tsuchikages), Omoiton=Emotion Release (Mo's kekkei genkai), Hiton=Fire Release, Raiton=Lightning Release, Mizuton=Water Release, Doton=Earth Release, Hoton=Ice Release, Futon=Wind Release (I wasn't talking about the sofa bed), and Aiton=Love Release (Miji's kekkei genkai, I ran out of ideas). And also, Tori's accent, kikan, it translates to mirror. So that's my translation notes._

_So now I'll begin._

Sakura was falling asleep, lulled by the music drifting through her open window. It was serene, a young woman, a lullaby version of a song she thought she'd heard before.

"… waratte ita boku no yo wasuwo, abaite kimi no yu kumichi wa kimi no shi ka wa kuranai…" Sakura's eyelids fluttered once, twice, and then closed, she was finally asleep.

The brunette kunoichi on the roof adjacent to Sakura's roof stopped the song abruptly, signaling her blonde teammate to move now, both were female, and they were around 13 years old. The blonde showed a love for the ground on which she walked, shown by her down to earth footsteps that fully hit the ground before taking off again, while the brunette seemed more sky driven, like she wanted to fly off, her light footsteps emphasized this. Both wore distinctive, high collared, black cloaks, patterned with blood-red clouds bordered with white. They reached the window, and the pair slowly climbed in. They'd been given orders, and an order was an order and had to be carried out.

The brunette stroked Sakura's pink hair. "Gina, it's soft," she murmured, "like a bunch of little flower petals, kikan."

"Tori," the blonde snapped Tori into attention, immobilizing Sakura by tying her arms and legs, "stop stalling and leave the orb, I already left everything else." The brunette moved the hand stroking Sakura's pink hair and stroked her own, tied in a long, silky ponytail. It was a combination of almond, chestnut, caramel, chocolate, tiger's eye, and coffee brown, making it impossible to note as any color in particular, just brown. The brunette was put out that she couldn't simply pull out a strand, she pulled an orb out of the black pouch tied to the belt around her waist, it was glass, but it was colored like cobalt, starting out the color of an autumn sky, and then transcending to become darker and darker, until it was almost black. The orb matched the kunoichi's famous eyes, where the obsidian pupil in the center was barely noticeable. She placed it beside a lock of sun kissed hair and a square of pale green nephrite, matching her partner's beautiful eyes. She also withdrew a kunai; it wasn't black iron, or even silver, but crystalline blood red. the moonlight shone through the kunai's transparent surface, bathing the wall, floor, and ceiling in blood red. The brunette placed the ruby kunai beside the orb.

"Gina, let's go, kikan," the brunette now held a scroll etched with the kanji character 'tori.'

The night in Konoha was broken by a solemn flap of wings, a large barn owl wearing a hitai-ate glided through a hole erected in the barrier surrounding Konoha, it glided onward, then, a suddenly as it had come, it was gone.

The first thing Sakura thought of as she drifted out of her dreamless sleep was how hungry she was. The second was that she wasn't even in Fire Country anymore; it looked more like Earth Country. The third thing was that she was tied up. And the fourth was that she had no idea who the two girls in front of her were, all she knew was that one was Iwa, one was Kumo, and both were Akatsuki. According to her brain, the second through fourth were way more important.

"Don't scream!" the Kumo Akatsuki warned frantically. _No Akatsuki from your village my ass Lord Raikage,_ Sakura thought angrily. The Kumo Akatsuki's face softened, ""Hungry, kikan?"

Sakura remembered the gnawing hunger plaguing her stomach and nodded. The Iwa Akatsuki grunted, "Don't untie her, tori."

"Wasn't gonna, kikan," tori looked exasperated, she rifled through her packs until she pulled out a green breaded kind of food, it resembled a pork bun, but green. She handed it to Sakura.

"What is it?" Sakura asked, kind of wary, not wanting to know whether or not the green color of the pork bun-like thing was natural.

"It's a red bean bun nimwit," tori smirked, "don't tell me you've never eaten one, kikan."

"Can't say I have," Sakura answered honestly, her mother never liked them.

"They're really sweet," tori pressed the red bean bun into Sakura's hands, "try it. Personally, they're my favorite next to spare ribs, kikan." Sakura, still reproachful, took a bite. Surprisingly enough, it was warm, and sweet, it was like a pork bun, only sweet, like a candy. Sakura took another bite, noting that the paste inside was a dull red.

"I take it you like it, kikan," tori smiled as Sakura quickly finished the red bean bun, "I like you already, and Gina'll like you too, though, you might not like her at first. Didja like my song, kikan?"

"That was you?" Sakura stared at tori, she looked only 13, her voice, that was beyond a teenage voice, maybe young adult, it was ironically similar to her pretty face, it made her look older if she kept any expression off it, but her happy demeanor always made her face that of a girl in her early teens or late preteens, "you've got the most beautiful voice, where did you learn to sing like that?"

"You'd laugh if I told you, kikan."

"I swear I won't laugh at all."

"Okay, promise you won't laugh, kikan?"

"Yes, yes!" now who taught you!"

"It was Hidan, he's an Akatsuki, and my godfather I call him Otou-san when he's not around, kikan."

"Really? I'll be honest, I never expected an Akatsuki to be a good teacher, especially not Hidan, and he's a bit well, annoyingly obnoxious."

"I know, Otou-san never seems the type to be anything but a criminal. He's a good person though, besides his drinking problem, perverted mind, he IS 22, and his very, erm, colorful language, he's an idiot too, but he tries, kikan."

"No matter what, he's still an asshole tori," Gina muttered, "you act like that nudist alcoholic pedophile is a good person, goddamn pedobear."

"He's my _godfather_!" tori snapped, "I can't just act like he's an asshole, and it's better than your obsession with that creeper atheist freak show with an infatuation for money, you love that goddamn bastard, kikan!"

"Kakuzu-nii has a better obsession than your 'godfather' does!"

"Otou-san has morals! Kakuzu is just a fucking asshole, kikan!"

"Take that back!"

"Make me, kikan!"

"THAT'S QUITE ENOUGH YOU TWO, HM!" a blonde Akatsuki stepped into the campsite, Sakura immediately recognized him as Gaara's kidnapper, "she's here, isn't she, hm?"

"Right here mouth boy, Gina shoved Sakura into Deidara, the two landed in a very… uncomfortable, position.

"Gina!" Deidara grunted, "when I asked if she was here, that, under no circumstances, gave you the right to do that, hm."

"I think you and the pink-head look kinda cute together," Gina flashed an evil smile. Deidara shot her a death glare.

"Shut it, hm," Deidara hissed.

"Okay pathetic pink-head," Gina forced a change in subject, "I bet you're wondering why we kidnapped you, right?"

"Let me guess," Sakura spat, "to capture Naruto." Gina was a real pill, and above all else, Sakura really, REALLY hated her.

"No," tori said, "we actually needed a medic-nin. You're from Konoha, you can fight, oh, and you defeated Sasori-sensei, kikan."

"Why should I?" Sakura hissed.

"If you don't," tori motioned to the conical black vent-like thing on her back, no longer happy or childish, "you'll scald to death in a flurry of hot mist, kikan."

"Jouton?" Sakura murmured to herself, "isn't that a kekkei genkai?"

"Yes," tori adjusted the strap on the vent-like thing, "copied from the first Gobi jinchūriki's ninjutsu, kikan."

"Kazankiri clan members are from Yugakure," Sakura struggled to put two and two together, "how can you be one?"

"They transferred me, kikan" tori helped Sakura up as Deidara and Gina began to walk away.

"Why?"

"Apparently to protect me from Jashin revolt," tori smirked playfully, "but what they didn't know is that my godfather was an active Jashinist, kikan."

"Move it brats, hm!" Deidara called.

"We're coming, kikan!" tori called as she and Sakura ran to catch up.

End of Chapter 1

_So how was the first chapter? More is coming soon. Gina and tori aren't the only fan characters to make an appearance. The others will come in soon, thank god. The song tori is singing in the beginning is Parallel Hearts by FictionJunction. If you haven't realized yet, Tori's last name is Kazankiri, which means 'volcano mist' in rough translation. This refers to her abilities with steam, which she can literally scald you to death with, that is Jouton. Gina's attitude in this part is a short spanned battle reflex, she doesn't act like it ever again in the story when she's not on a mission. Hope you liked this chapter, chapter 2 isn't done yet, it's still on my iPod notes, once I finish it I'll get it off, type it up and post it. Lacie is gonna be featured next chapter, though, the name won't be mentioned (and by Lacie I mean the Pandora Hearts Lacie)._


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: Mi Tsuki Tori

_Hi again! I told you I'd update soon didn't I? So the title translates to "Beautiful Moon Bird." I'm weird with this kind of stuff. Don't ask. 2 Spoiler alerts! 1: I mention Lacie from Pandora Hearts in this chapter as a piano piece, not named, but it is played, the "composer" of the song is Elliot Nightray. Okay, 2: The leader isn't mentioned appearance-wise in this chapter, I'll do it soon, okay? Warning to all males: there are some parts in this chapter you might want to skip past, for one thing, a girl is writing this fanfic, and girls are excessive with describing people, if you don't want to read all of it, skip it when you get to it, and males, skip the ending of the entranceway scene and the beginning of the Hina conversation if you don't want to be confused by the world of B-R-As. Enjoy!_

Tori paused, "Holy shit," she said loudly, "_someone_'s been on a killing spree, kikan." Sakura nudged Gina out of the way to see a clearing drenched in red blood, on the wall above a small cave was a tag that read "forbidden" in black kanji. Tori groaned and stretched.

"So I take it this means I'm on report duty," Gina asked.

"No shit Sherlock, kikan," Tori smiled sweetly. She stepped up to the cave mouth and made five seals, bird, dog, rat, ram, and tiger, and muttered the call for release. The image of a cave mouth turned into a rock face with a small teahouse in the front. "Aki Hazumi Teahouse" the sign read. _Odd,_ Sakura thought, _they run a teahouse, but I couldn't see it._ Tori walked calmly over to the kitchen door and slammed it unceremoniously open. She stormed through the kitchen and into a backroom, which she also slammed open. "Who's responsible for the pile of dead bodies outside, kikan?" she asked.

"Kakuzu I guess," a voice replied. Sakura tried to see over Deidara, she grunted in frustration, standing on her toes to see over him. After awhile, she got fed up and shoved him aside. Two males, both in about their late teens to early twenties were sitting across from each other on the floor. One had long, blue-black hair pulled back into a low ponytail with bangs framing his face and pitch black eyes. The other had shoulder-length silver hair that a lot of hair gel was obviously used to slick it out of his hair, and a distinctive pinkish-purple eye color. The first was dressed in a white t-shirt and dark colored jeans; the second was wearing a black wife-beater, a beaded necklace with a circumscribed triangle and dark gray Bermuda shorts. Both were holding cards, okay, the first one was holding three cards, and the other was holding a single card.

"21!" the second screamed randomly. Of course, they were playing Black Jack.

"Damn!" the first screamed back, "How the hell do you do that, Hidan?"

"I'm just awesome like that!" Hidan smirked and held out his hand, "fork it over Itachi, you owe me 2,000 ryo, bitch!" Itachi simply grunted and handed him most of the stack of money he had.

"Surprised, hm?" Deidara whispered.

"Kinda," Sakura replied quietly, "you guys gamble?"

"Yeah," Deidara smiled slightly, "not a ton, Leader-sama doesn't exactly approve of gambling, we still do, Hidan is probably the best, hm."

"Hidan," Tori smirked, "Itachi, can you please move? You're in our way, kikan."

"Oh," Hidan smirked and stood to move, "hey Deidara, guess what Itachi tried to teach me?"

"What, hm?" Deidara looked amused.

"Shoji," Hidan's smile widened, "I'm actually better than him."

"We'll see how good you really are," Deidara smirked, "gimme a sec and I'll play you, hm."

"I've been challenged by the Akatsuki Shoji master!" Hidan screamed as he left the room. Deidara laughed and began to take off his shoes.

"He'll be mauled," Gina said, "poor him. I gotta go report, see you."

"Lates, kikan," Tori said, "Sakura, you need clothes?"

"Yeah," Sakura replied.

"'Kay," Tori looked at Deidara, who was now on the raised part of the entranceway, "you want to take the headband to Mo, kikan?"

"Sure," Deidara held his hand out to Sakura, who reluctantly handed him her Konoha hitai-ate, "shoes off before you enter, hm."

"Get into real clothes, kikan," Tori shoved Deidara out of the room.

"Later, hm," Deidara snickered. When Tori was completely certain he was gone, she looked at Sakura.

"Wearin' a sports bra or what, kikan?" she said curtly.

"Yeah," Sakura felt her face get slightly warm; Itachi was still in the room. Tori followed Sakura's eyes to Itachi, who looked slightly amused.

"GET THE FUCK OUT!" Tori screamed, "GIRL SHIT! NONE OF YOUR FUCKIN' BUISNESS!"

"Just like Hidan," Itachi said, "an excessive curser, especially when you're mad."

"GET OUT!" Tori shoved Itachi out.

"Sorry," Sakura said, "I should've told you."

"No problem, kikan," Tori smiled, "so, I better take you to Hina, she's just like Hidan, she has the freak eyes, kikan."

"What's that mean?"

"Hina can guess your cup size, no joke, kikan." Tori pulled Sakura through the entranceway, under an arch that read in bold black kanji, "Otome Shinshitsu." Tori pulled Sakura through an elaborate set of colorful doors, a red, a black, a blue, a green, and an orange. Tori came to a stop at a chipped hot pink door with a neon colored rainbow painted over it. Tori knocked on the door, "Hina! You in there, kikan?" A loud riff from a guitar was the only response. Tori sighed and took a deep breath. "HINA!"

The music stopped abruptly. A girl with bright red hair and the same pink-purple eyes as Hidan opened the door. She was wearing a pair of dark blue denim shorts and a bright red cami. "Wassup Tor?" the girl asked, "You're loud."

"Stop blasting your goddamn stereo," Tori said, "this is Sakura, the new medic, she needs clothes, kikan."

"Okay," Hina smiled, "no problem."

"Wait," Sakura said, "I need proof she can be accurate."

"Oh god," Tori rolled her eyes, "Hina, kikan?"

"Fine," Hina said, exasperated, "Tori: cup size: 30C, pant size: 1, shirt size: small, dress size: 1, convinced?"

Sakura looked at Tori's thin fifteen year old form (A/N: Tori is 14) and nodded. "Good," Hina looked Sakura up and down, "cup size: 34B, pant size: 3, shirt size: medium, dress size: 3. Okay, Konan has your shirt size, I've got your cup size, um… oh, Miyuki has your pant and dress size. Well, Tori go put on some real clothes and meet us up at the clothing closet."

"'Kay," Tori began to walk off, "hey, Sakura by the way, at 4, do ya wanna meet everyone else in the hideout, kikan?"

"Sure," Sakura smiled faintly, "I'll see you."

"Yup, kikan," Tori turned on her heels and disappeared into the red door that she and Sakura had passed earlier.

"The paint tells us which one is our room," Hina said, "it's why mine has the rainbow added, your room is the pink one at the end, across from the brown one." Hina pointed to a door painted soft pink, across from another that was a cinnamon color. "Now let's go get you clothes."

"So," Hidan moved a knight, "whacha think of the new girl?"

"Weird, hm," Deidara replied, capturing the knight.

"She's pretty," Itachi said.

"Hmph," Sasori grunted, "I still disagree with this girl being part of our organization."

"What's his problem?" Hidan asked.

"He's pissed cuz a girl beat the shit out of him and now he has to work with her, hm," Deidara smirked, moving his rook, "checkmate, Hidan, hm."

"Damn," Hidan leaned on the back of his chair, "you're fucking good."

"Ever played a Nara, hm?" Deidara challenged.

"No."

"Then you'll never beat me, I've beaten three, hm."

"Holy shit, that's awesome."

"It was easy, sort of, hm."

"So what's your opinion?"

"On what?"

"A new member of course!"

"I'm fine with it, as long as it's not another guy, we have enough, hm."

"You're still sour about Tobi."

"Shut the fuck up or I sock you in the face, hm."

"Whatever."

"That's cute," Hina smiled, "pastels look good on you."

"You think?" Sakura looked at her, "I've been told the opposite."

"It's like how Tori looks good in dark colors and reds," Konan pulled a dress from a rack near her; it was a strapless, dark red-purple knee length with a black sash, "this one's a favorite of hers."

"We all have a preference according to our color palette," Hina smirked, "like me, I dye my hair a different color every day, my hair doesn't wear out, it's a weird property the Jashin hiden. But no matter what, my hair and clothes are always bright."

"Really Hina?" a voice said. Sakura looked over to the dressing room to see Tori, dressed in a girl's black wife-beater and light gray cargo pants that bagged slightly at her feet, "It's four, ready to go, kikan?"

"Yes," Sakura said.

"Let's get to Leader-sama's room then, kikan," Tori smiled gestured for the three Akatsuki girls to follow.

"So you already know Deidara, Gina, Sasori, Hidan, Itachi, Konan, Hina, Tori, and Miyuki," the Akatsuki leader gestured to the small group loitering lazily over on the right side of his room. Konan was a young woman with light blue hair and gray eyes, currently wearing a royal blue cami and generic denim jeans. Deidara's blonde hair was pulled into a full ponytail and he was dressed in a light gray t-shirt and dark khaki Bermuda shorts. Miyuki was a white-haired, green eyed girl about Sakura's age who was extremely interested in showing her hair wasn't a reason to think she wasn't a colorful person, especially shown in the rainbow tye-dye tube top and light blue denim shorts she was wearing. Sakura was surprised to see Sasori alive, his red hair was slightly longer, starting to get in the way of his almond eyes, and he was wearing a red t-shirt (a bad choice in Sakura's honest opinion, the red was the same shade as his hair, which was just creepy) and black denim jeans. And Gina, she seemed a lot more apathetic, and was wearing a light blue sundress decorated with sunflower embroidery at the ends.

"That idiot's Tobi," the Akatsuki leader pointed at a clumsy black haired boy wearing a dark gray t-shirt and jeans, he had a deep black eye, and the other was covered by a black eye patch. "That's Neko," the leader pointed to a girl with orange hair and cow brown eyes in an orange halter dress. "Over there are Kakuzu and Kisame," the leader pointed to a pair trying to control Tobi. Sakura guessed that the one with coffee brown hair, olive skin, and pupiless sea foam green eyes, and wearing a black tee and jeans was Kakuzu and the blue skinned, navy blue haired guy in the red "Save the Fishes" tank and khaki surfer shorts was Kisame. "And last, over there is Mo and Miji," the leader pointed to a pair of ten year old twins, both blonde haired and sapphire eyes. One was chipper and bouncy; she was like a mini-Deidara, a long blonde ponytail wrapped in a red ribbon and bangs covering one eye, dressed in a black t-shirt with "truth" sloppily painted on it in kanji, and white overalls with the suspenders at her waist. The other had her hair in pigtails, she was wearing an inversed version of her twin's tee and overalls, only her tee read "time" in neat blue kanji; the second one was more still and serious. Sakura never really liked identical twins, they were practically impossible to tell apart, and when people said their names together, you couldn't figure out which was which. Deidara seemed to read Sakura's confused look, he walked over and tapped her shoulder.

"Mo looks like me," he said, "Miji doesn't, hm."

"Oh, thanks," Sakura nodded, "are they…?"

"My little sisters?" Deidara smirked, "yeah, they are, hm."

"Okay then," the Akatsuki leader, who was standing in the shadows so he was unrecognizable as anything but a silhouette, turned and walked off, "go do whatever."

"Gina!" Tori pulled Sakura over to Gina, "Do we have time to show Sakura your piano, kikan?"

"I guess," Gina smiled slightly, "what song?"

"My fave, kikan," Tori replied. Most of this time Sakura was looking back and forth between the two, now Tori half-pulled, half-dragged her out of the leader's room and to another part of the house.

"She's pretty," Mo lounged on the couch, "I like her."

"She can't tell me from Mo," Miji grunted, "I don't."

"They're like Yin and Yang," Kakuzu said, "and they act like it too."

"Sakura-chan's pretty," Tobi smiled, "don't you think so Senpai?"

"Why are you asking me?" Deidara glared at Tobi, she's pretty, yeah, but she's a bother, we had enough to deal with, hm."

"Damn!" Hidan screamed, "Tobi's almost as good at shoji as you, Deidara."

"How is that possible?" Deidara looked at the board, "Wow, that's creepy, hm."

"Tobi is smart!" Tobi laughed.

"Shut up, hm" Deidara grunted, "now."

"Like it, kikan?" Tori whispered, Sakura nodded. For the past half hour Sakura and Tori had been listening to Gina play piano. The first song was apparently Tori's favorite, a little music box tune. Tori and Gina found it somewhere, but since the person who composed it had illegible handwriting, the name and composer of the tune were unknown.

"It's almost dinnertime Tori," Gina stopped playing.

"DINNER!" Konan's voice hollered from the kitchen, "HURRY UP! OR THE MONSTERS ARE GONNA EAT IT!"

"Monsters?" Sakura asked.

"Mo and Miji, kikan," Tori said, running out of the room.

"Looks like curry rice," Gina said, "we'd better hurry, if we get there too late there won't be any left."

Later that night, Sakura was in bed, trying to sleep, the door creaked open, Tori slid in.

"Mind?" Tori asked.

"No," Sakura sat up, "I couldn't sleep anyway."

"Cool," Tori smiled, "sorry if the other members are kinda cold at first, the guys really don't like newcomers. A lot of the guys are still warming up to Tobi, especially Deidara, kikan."

"Why?"

"Well Deidara and Hidan are more recent, and Deidara, he didn't enter the Akatsuki willingly. I wouldn't blame him if he didn't talk to you much for the first week, kikan."

"Deidara and Hidan seem close."

"Hidan and Deidara are similar in a lot of different ways, a really good example is Hina, Mo, Miji and me, kikan."

"How so?"

"Remember how I told you Hidan was my godfather and I was transferred in case of Jashin revolt, I half lied, Hidan is my godfather, but I wasn't transferred in case of Jashin revolt, I was transferred because the Kazankiri clan was wiped out, kikan."

"Like the Uchiha clan?"

"Yeah, sorry for lying. I really don't feel comfortable talking about it, kikan."

"Oh, okay."

"Well, goodnight, kikan."

"Yeah, night." Tori smiled, and left the room. Sakura smiled at the door and faded into sleep.

_Yeah, good huh? This is good right? There is a huge chunk of background stories I make up because I have barely any story background info on any Akatsuki, minus Itachi or Kisame. So I'll make up a lot. I don't know if Hidan and Deidara are only children or if they have siblings. Oh, and soon I'm going to unveil a new aspect of Gina. She's not bipolar, the whole annoying b**** aspect of Gina is simply a SSBR, Short Spanned Battle Reflex, the next aspect and the one you just saw are both aspects of the girl Gina is based off of. Hina's current personality is mostly the older sister of my best friend, but Hina's main personality is that of my best friend. So, look forward to chapter 3, DeiSaku elements will begin then, I promise. Chapter 3 coming soon!_


	3. Chapter 3: Aka Ketsueki Sasori

_This took forever, I know, and I swear it's not my fault at all! I have no time; eighth grade project has taken up a #!*% of a lot of time. Now I'd like you all to do something for me, if you read my fanfics, please review them! I want to know what you think! By the way, does anyone know what an OC is? I have absolutely no idea. Thanks ENJOY!_

* * *

"SAKURA!" Tori's frantic voice snapped Sakura awake.

"Hmm?" Sakura rubbed her arm with the back of her hand, "What's wrong?"

"GINA'S CHUGGING COFFEE IN THE KITCHEN," Tori's blue eyes were the size of plates, "HELP! Get Deidara, he's in his room, hurry, kikan."

"Where's that?"

"His isn't hard to find, it's black, kikan."

"Okay." Sakura stood up and walked out the door, forgetting that she was dressed in a thin, lacy, pink camisole and extra short, black exercise shorts, and that Deidara was about her age. She also forgot that Deidara was rarely in his room, sometimes he even slept on the couch. She carelessly opened the door.

"Holy #!*% !" Deidara slammed the door back closed, "Have you ever heard of knocking, hm?"

"Sorry!" Sakura said, "I forgot." (A/N: Deidara wasn't wearing a shirt.)

"Did you forget pants too, hm?"

"No!"

"Then get a longer pair of pants, those look like panties, hm."

"Shut up!"

"Whatever, you needed me, hm?"

"Gina's chugging coffee."

" #!*% . YO HIDAN, WHERE'RE THE CAFFINE PILLS?"

"DUNNO!"

"KAKUZU?"

"WE'RE OUT!"

" #!*% , get dressed, we've got a mission today, now move it, hm."

"Okay."

* * *

"The mission is simple," the Akatsuki leader gave a brief smile; he wasn't in the shadows anymore, so Sakura had a better look at him. He was still in his pajamas, as were the other six people in the room, Sakura forgot to get dressed, so Hidan was paying more attention to her than anyone else, including the leader. The Akatsuki leader had short, spiky orange hair that reminded Sakura of Naruto, and strange dark gray eyes. She felt a purge of homesickness, remembering Naruto.

"Hidan," a young woman's voice said, "pay attention." A book hit Hidan's head.

"As I said," the Akatsuki leader continued, "the mission is simple, all you have to do is assassinate a certain person, his name is Kaji, he's been bothering us lately, and we don't want him bothering us any longer. Hidan is taking part in this mission, as is Deidara, since you two can't seem to control yourselves on missions, I'm recruiting Kei." A young woman with orange hair tied in a bun that looked like an onion, and the leader's gray eyes appeared from the shadows.

"Hi Kyuukei, hm!" Deidara snickered.

The girl held up a fist, and spat a reply in a different language ("_Clausus tui forca femina vir__!_")

"Well done onion girl," Hidan clapped. Two books simultaneously hit Hidan upside the head, one thrown by Kei, the other by Deidara. "WILL YOU TWO STOP THROWING HORROR CLASSICS AT MY HEAD?"

"No," Kei and Deidara said simultaneously. Sakura picked the books up off the floor (and being wolf whistled by Hidan, who was a bit of a pervert) and looked at them. _Hidan's pretty cultured,_ she thought to herself.

"Now then," Kei faked a smile, "get the #!*% dressed #!*% ."

* * *

"Face it Hidan," Deidara snatched the map out of Hidan's hand, "you have absolutely no idea where we're going, hm."

"I am not!" Hidan snatched the map back, " #!*% you!"

"Hidan," Kei turned around, "where are we anyway?"

"Land of Earth, I think," Hidan looked around, totally oblivious.

"Yeah, give the map to Deidara," Sasori said from the back, "you're hopelessly lost, we're supposed to be headed in the direction of a coastal village that ferries people to the Land of Waves, which is in the south, not the north."

" #!*% ," Neko spat.

"Shut it mesuinu!" Hidan spat, handing Deidara the map.

"Thank you, hm," Deidara smirked.

* * *

"We're here!" Tori smiled, "Gina, don't pull my ponytail, kikan!"

"Tail?" Gina gave a slurred giggle, "Is Tori-kun a monkey?"

"No!" Tori flicked Gina in the head, "we're so buying caffeine pills first thing, kikan!"

"Agreed," Hidan shifted away from the giggling maniac. Tori sped off in the direction of a pharmacy, dragging Gina in tow, who was now screaming "NO TOUCHING ME!" over and over again. An awkward silence passed, and then Deidara clapped his hands together.

"Okay!" he said, "Sakura, Kyuukei, and I will go find a boat, Hidan, you, Sasori, and Neko go get a hotel room at an inn somewhere around here. We've gotta stay the night here cuz Hidan has no sense of direction, hm."

"Shut your trap girly man!" Kei snapped.

"_Dito hier ajuin meid_!" Deidara hissed. Sakura rubbed her head from the sheer confusion of two speaking in different languages.

"Why do you speak in so many different languages?" Sakura asked.

"So other people don't know what we're saying, hm," Deidara replied. A man ran into Deidara, who screamed loudly, "_elasticidade meu dorso bolsa tu burro_, hm."

"_Nunca_!" the man replied hostily. Kei kicked the man in his, erm… sensitive spot, and took Deidara's wallet back.

"That's why," Kei said, "the two of us speak a ton of languages, we've already used three."

"Let's get a boat, hm," Deidara said, walking towards the docks.

* * *

"A boat to the Land of Waves for tomorrow?" the fisherman scratched his head, "yeah, I've got room, but you'll need to share it with a bridge builder and his grandson, do ya mind?"

"Not really, hm" Deidara smiled.

"Alright, see ya tonight," the fisherman waved goodbye.

"Yo, Deidara!" Hidan screamed, suddenly materializing next to Deidara.

"OW!" Deidara rubbed his ear, "What is it Hidan, hm?"

"We met some people heading to the same place as us; they agreed to share the boat they're taking if we paid for part of their inn fee. It's an old man and his grandson."

"Probably the same people going on this boat Hidan, hm."

"Okay, well come on, I said we needed our group leader's consent, and technically, you and Kei are the leaders currently."

"Sure thing, hm." Sakura followed the three to a small inn a few minutes from their original spot. In the front, Tori and Gina were talking with a familiar looking old man. More so, Gina, who was obviously no longer drunk on coffee, was speaking with the old man, and Tori was talking to a little kid around 10. Sakura racked her brain to remember who the pair was, and then the little boy spoke, as if he recognized her.

"Sakura-neechan?"

* * *

_The end! Well, of chapter 3 anyway, Kei is basically a real person version of Pein's second animal path. The three languages spoken were, in order, Latin, Dutch, and Portuguese. Chapter 4 is coming soon! Review this #!*% ! And look at my profile! Please wait for other updates! and For god's sake! Read Turntable of Time if you hate Kabuto and want him to die!_

_- Akatsuki Princess Samitra Tori & Peeves (my sister)_


	4. Chapter 4: Vampire Lamb not japanese!

**Hi again, mad at me for forcing you to wait? Too bad, I was busy. Anyway, this is my newest chapter. I know, the excuse sucks, but I needed to catch Turntable of Time up. By the way, start reviewing, or I'll start censoring, and Hidan's no good if he doesn't curse. Anyway, this is a review question, review if you know the answer: Me and a buddy of mine got into an argument and this was the result. My question is this: Is Hidan's name pronounced like it looks or is the "Hi" pronounced "hee" like somebody's laughing? For reference, my answer is that it's pronounced like it looks. So I'm starting to ask you people a question to see if you're actually reading this, also review answer this one: Who is Kaji and why does Hidan have a long standing rivalry with him? Last review question: I have two friends I based two characters off of, one is Gina, and the other is Hina, who was the creator of the lamb line in this chapter? I'll post the answer to question 3 next chapter. Okay, now read this dammit!**

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**P.S. **_**flashback, **__thought, _"_another language_," regular text, "**emphasis,**"

**Author's Note**

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"Kaji?" Inari tilted his head at Sakura, "That's who these guys are looking for? Do you mean Himizu no Kaji? He's pretty much a legendary criminal around the Land of Waves." Sakura widened her eyes, a criminal? No wonder. Hidan scoffed, as if to say he didn't care.

"Who cares about this bastard's history in the Land of Waves?" he said, "He's still on our hit-list."

"Hidan," Kei grunted, "_memento mori_, you can't be immortal forever, you'll die eventually."

"Shut up Kei," Deidara muttered, "this is important to Hidan, hm."

"Important or not, he needs to keep his temper," Kei said. Sakura sighed, Hidan was definitely over his wave of seasickness (no pun intended), he was plainly getting annoyed as Kaji's name was thrown around so casually.

"Shut the fuck up Kei!" Hidan blew up, "goddammit, you're so fucking annoying!" Kei flinched and shrunk back, Deidara stared at Hidan.

"Watch your language," Deidara hissed back, "the kid's only ten, hm!"

"I don't give a shit!" Hidan screamed and stormed off. Deidara rubbed his temples in irritation.

"That idiot," he muttered, "Sakura, I need you in case Hidan tries to kill me." Sakura nodded and followed Deidara in the direction Hidan was heading in.

* * *

Hidan groaned; he was an idiot. As conceited as he was, Hidan could admit that much. First mistake: he cursed in front of people he barely knew, second mistake: he'd screamed at his closest friend, maybe this was why Kei was assigned, but Kei did absolutely nothing to fix his temper, she only made things worse. Still, her words echoed in her head _memento mori_.

"'Remember you will die,'" Hidan muttered quietly, remembering Kaji's last words to him.

_**Begin Flashback:**_

_**About 10 years ago…**_

_**Hidan's eyes snapped open, everything happened so fast that he had no time to react, as soon as his eyes opened a silver dagger dug itself into his chest.**_

"_**Damn it," he sputtered, coughing up blood, "what's this about Kaji?"**_

"_**Orders from the top," the masked shinobi hissed, "you've been illegally experimenting, the leaders needed to send out a last order before ending the Yugakure's career as a ninja village."**_

"_**Bullshit!" Hidan screamed. Even as he said it, he was lying, he had been illegally experimenting, and he volunteered, since the technique being used was relatively new.**_

"_**Bull, is it?" Kaji snickered, "Really? Explain why you're not dying, you've been given too many chances when it comes to your violent Jashinist tendencies. For Christ's sake Hidan! You've been spared until now because you're still loyal to the village; don't go AWOL over your religion."**_

"_**Kaji," Hidan narrowed his eyes, "when have I ever been loyal to those assholes, look at the two houses on either side of mine, you'll see all you need. Now just walk away, you're the only Yugakure nin left, just drop it." Kaji smiled beneath his mask.**_

"**Memento mori**_** little Hidan," he said, "remember you will die, farewell, we'll see each other again someday, someday soon." And with that, he was gone, leaving the 12 year old Jashinist alone. Hidan forced himself to swallow a sob, but tears flowed freely down his face.**_

_**End Flashback**_

Hidan shook his head clear. _that was 10 years ago, forget it, it's irrelevant, you know that,_ he told himself, _goddammit, YOU NEVER CARED ABOUT THAT BASTARD_.

"Hidan!" a voice called, Deidara. Hidan looked back, the blonde gave his signature smirk, probably to mask the fact that he was worried that Hidan would get lost, and he was right, Hidan had absolutely no idea where he was. (**A/N**: Hidan's directional equivalent: Peeves. I swear, my sister can get lost in the mall when a map is right in front of her.)

"Hey Dei," Hidan forced a smile.

"Really," Deidara smirked and gave his friend a playful shove, "what's with you? Didja know Kaji or something, hm?"

"Ye"- Hidan cut off before he could finish his answer, Deidara wasn't alone. He'd brought Sakura with. "Why is **she** here?" he hissed angrily, Deidara flinched, "you little son of a bitch, WHAT IS SHE DOING HERE?" Hidan was well aware of the volume of his voice, he didn't care; he was pissed. Sakura had shrunken back into a line of trees where she couldn't see him, and he couldn't see her. It didn't matter. If he'd had a better temper, Deidara might not have been up against a tree, broken into a cold sweat, with pure terror in his eyes. "GODDAMMIT!"

Hidan was far beyond self restraint by now, Deidara clamped his eyes shut, bracing himself for a serious beating.

* * *

"Where'd Deidara go?" Kei turned and looked at Neko and Sasori, who should've been keeping an eye on the rookie, who was also missing.

"Beats me," Sasori shrugged.

"I'll go find him then," Kei gestured to Neko, "you're coming with."

"Okay," Neko replied.

"Sasori, you're in charge," Kei said as they left. Kei had already listed the top places Deidara could possibly be in her head, with Hidan was at the top. Kei sighed, she liked Deidara, but he really didn't make sense to her. Why, of all people, did he choose to make friends with Hidan?

"Kei," Neko muttered, they were getting closer, not like Kei noticed, she was busy thinking. Neko said her name a few more times, each time her voice grew louder and more urgent, Kei simply ignored her, that is, until she saw a small red stain near her right foot.

"Neko," Kei looked up at the terrified girl, "what's going on?"

"Look for yourself," Neko whimpered, pointing to the field in front of her.

For a basic description of the field normally, it was a green, grassy field with a couple boulders here and there. This is what Kei saw.

The first immediate thing she saw was the blood, Kei never liked blood, and it was everywhere, the boulders looked as if something already soaked in blood was dragged across it. Any green that was noticeable was at the edges or in really small spots.

The second thing was the bloody lump in the center. Through the blood there were signs of long blonde hair, and pitch black cloth: Deidara.

Lastly, a form was becoming clearer in the forest opposite to them, it was Sakura, she was terrified.

* * *

Throughout the trip to the inn, Kei had walked in silence, every curse she could think of was too good for that bastard, no, he couldn't even be given the dignity to be called that. She knew full well who beat Deidara to a pulp, and she was prepared to do the same to him. _Damn you Hidan_, Kei thought, _you're his friend and you'd do this to him? You're lower than scum._

"How's the lump?" Sasori entered the room and leaned on the doorway. A figure stood beside him, but it was indefinable.

"Fine," Kei replied, "I'm surprised you care."

"It's not me who was asking," Sasori rolled his eyes, "Hidan's too scared of what you'll do to him if he asks."

"I'll kill him either way," Kei growled. The silhouette retreated a few steps.

"you don't have to be so harsh," Sasori tried to smile, but it turned out crooked, "Hidan had a temper burst earlier, if Deidara did something stupid, like, say, bring the rookie with him, he'd probably loose control."

"It's no excuse for almost killing him."

"You contributed to his mood."

"How?"

"Kei, Kaji isn't one of those names you use casually around Hidan, and not many Akatsuki know why, but almost all of them know not to just say 'Kaji' whenever they goddamn well please."

"Enlighten me then."

"Hm?"

"Tell me why Kaji is such a taboo word, I'd love to know."

"Look, it's one of those sensitive topics."  
"Just tell me."

"Himizu no Kaji was one of the five shinobi that Yugakure sent out to kill Hidan just before he went AWOL. To be specific, he was the fifth and final, as well as the one who had the closest relationship with Hidan."

"Not a valid reason enough."

"Never mind, you wouldn't get it."

"Hey Sasori," Hidan cut in from outside, he was further away now, right around a window obviously, "check this out."

"What?" Sasori walked over to Hidan and out of Kei's line of sight. A few seconds later, Sasori walked back in with a slightly bemused look on his face.

"Did something funny happen?" Kei asked.

"We just saw a black lamb eat a wolf," Sasori said, trying to hold back laughter. (**A/N**: yeah, rare, I know, it's still hilarious that he's even smiling, besides, this made my Sasori-like friend begin to laugh out loud)

"What?" Kei narrowed her eyes.

"OKAY THIS IS THE FUCKING BASICS!" Hidan screamed from the hallway, "THERE WAS THIS TINY BLACK LAMB WITH FUCKING VAMPIRE FANGS, OKAY? AND THE FUCKING LAMB WENT UP TO THIS LIKE HUGE, BAD-ASS WOLF, AND FUCKING ATE THE GODDAMN WOLF. IT ATE THIS HUGE WOLF AND IT WAS WHAT? TWO FEET HIGH?"

Kei was quiet for a few seconds. "That's impossible," she said.

"Exactly," Hidan walked in and smiled wide, "our trails back on track."

* * *

**Okay, this was like, 100% improv, minus the sheep thing, and the flashback (which took forever thank you). Now in case you didn't know, Hidan is from a ninja village that isn't a ninja village anymore, it's a tourist spot (I find this hilarious). Kaji is a name that I like to use for antagonists and shit. So, a recap of the questions I want you guys to answer. 1: Is Hidan's name pronounced like it looks or is the "Hi" pronounced "hee" like somebody's laughing? 2: Who is Kaji and why does Hidan have a long standing rivalry with him? 3: Who was the creator of the lamb line in this chapter, Hina or Gina? I'll update soon, keep reading! The Naruto-Harry Potter crossover will be updated soon, possibly tomorrow, keep reading my fanfics!**

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**P.S. This has been in my head all day:**

**The Amityville Toaster,**

**Make breakfast spooky,**

**Spooky talk from toaster,**

**Spooky eat me toast!**

**Yum, yum, yum.**

**Human hand.**


	5. Chapter 5: Who's Cryin' Now

Who's Crying Now

**So if you read Turntable of Time, you'll know that this chapter has something to do with religion. Also, one of my friends asked me if I killed Deidara, the answer to that stupid question is no. WHY WOULD I KILL HIM IF THE STORY WAS A DEISAKU? Actually, for once, the title is accurate, if that spoils anything, but it probably doesn't (in case you were wondering, Who's Crying Now is by a band called Journey). I'm not writing the titles in Japanese anymore, it takes too long to translate exactly what I want to say. In case you didn't know, Aka Ketsuki Sasori is translated to "Blood Red Scorpion." Also, if you were wondering why I'm so insane, blame manga! Anyway, read, review, rate, favorite, follow, anonymous reviews are taken. I HAVE A POLL! CHECK IT OUT!**

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Regular Text, **Author's Note**, _Outer_ _Thought_, _**Flashback**_, Title, "**Emphasis**," "_LOE (Language Other than English)_," _Inner Thought_, _**Middle Thought**_, **Sent Thought**

* * *

Kei growled, hostility was one of her strong suits, and it worked to scare the living daylights out of Hidan, who was spitting out curses every ten seconds. She liked making things clear, one f her main things was that Deidara was her punching bag, no one else's.

Sasori laughed, "Kei, stop growling like a dog, you're succeeding in scaring the living daylights out of more than Hidan." Kei grunted in reply.

"Fuckin' bitch," Hidan hissed.

"God you two are unbearable, kikan!" Tori screamed, "Can't one of you apologize to the other and let us finish this goddamn mission, kikan?"

"No," they said in unison.

"Maybe I should've hopped Gina up on coffee and locked you guys in a room with her till you two apologize, kikan," Tori growled.

"That's a good idea," Sasori said, "better than any other I've seen, besides the floorboards thing Deidara does."

"Yup," Tori smirked. Kei grimaced and cursed out Hidan in her head. _Those three better not screw anything up_, Kei thought to herself.

* * *

_Why did I agree to do this?_ Sakura asked herself, _I don't even like this guy_. _Well of course you do dumbass! Damn it! __Go away! __Why? It's fun to piss you off.__ I don't like it!__ You're not supposed to Sakura, now admit it, blondie here's totally hot!__ Shut up! __Fine, fine, I'll leave._

"That's pretty cool." Sakura jumped, she turned to see Neko in the doorway.

"What?" Sakura asked.

"You think on two scales," Neko smiled, "sorry if it creeps you out, I can read minds, I'm telepathic."

"That is kind of creepy," Sakura smiled slightly.

"Of course I don't use it a lot, but you were staring at Deidara-nii."

"I was?"

"Yeah, not that it's a bad thing or anything like that."

"So what did you mean by two scales?"

"Well there's usually one scale of conscious thought in the human brain, outer thought. You have two scales, the second is inner thought, unlike outer thought, your inner thought comes from your heart, so it's more accurate. I only know two people not including you who are aware of your inner thought, Gina has three scales, Kei also has three, and you have two."

"Kei has three scales?"

"And Gina, but Gina's inner thought is rarely open, her middle thought is really common."

"Is middle thought a third scale?"

"Yeah, middle thought is more like a reflex, it's not 100% accurate, it's more like what you want to say but you can't say it, Kei's inner and outer thought do agree though, her middle thought just curses out the person she's actually mad at."

"Really?"

"Yeah, like right now, even though her inner and outer thoughts are pissed at Hidan, but her middle thought is cursing out herself."

"Why would she be mad at herself?" _Isn't it obvious? It was her careless spouting off of Hidan's personal mood swings that pissed him off, and also her fault that she wasn't paying attention, she is leading this mission.__ How do you clarify this kind of stuff?_

"Your inner thought's right, of course, it is the feelings of the human heart, so it understands human emotion better."

"It's just annoying to me." _Gee, thanks._

"Usually it is, Gina's is obnoxious. Now you should probably get some rest, I'll keep watch over Deidara. Oh, and avoid Gina for a bit, it's almost Sunday, Gina's Christian."

"Okay." Sakura didn't know what a Christian was, but it sounded like that was important.

* * *

"So you guys were talking about a vampire lamb," Kei said skeptically.

"Kaji learned a new summoning, kikan?" Tori asked.

"That was Kaji?" Kei narrowed her eyes, "He summons vampire animals?"

"No," Hidan snickered, "he summons aggressive mutant animals that are fucking annoying."

"Like that rabbit?" Sasori said, gestured to a small black and white spotted rabbit knowing on a large black bear.

"Yeah," Hidan stopped on a tree branch, "that's one of his signature rabbits." The rabbit looked up at Hidan, its blue eye stared at him, its red was still focused on the bear carcass. Hidan shrugged slightly, as if to speak to the small rabbit. The rabbit reluctantly hopped away (**A/N: Rabbits aren't exactly the fastest thing when they're hopping, a running person can catch up, rabbits are unreliable messengers, it's a weakness of Kaji's, oh, and his aggressive creatures aren't cannibals, just carnivores.**)

"He's either really stupid or he overestimates that rabbit," Kei said, half amused half creeped out.

"It's the latter," Hidan smirked, "goddamn atheist."

"What's wrong with atheists?" Kei challenged.

"Oh, yeah," Hidan smirked. _He's unbearable! __You like him!__ Do not!__ Yeah you do!__ Piss off!_

"Kei," Tori called, "earth to Kei, kikan. YO! KYUUKEI!"

"What?" Kei asked.

"We're following the rabid rabbit, kikan," Tori pointed to Sasori and Hidan, who were walking in the direction the rabbit walked in.

"Rabid rabbit, hell," Hidan snickered, "that's a good one Tor."

* * *

_Why should I care? __Come on, he's nice.__ More like blatantly casual.__ Maybe you're in utter denial.__ Am not!__ Just what a lovesick girl in denial would say.__ Go back to sleep! I liked it better when you weren't speaking.__ I'm here because you're an insecure mess, deal with it.__ What if I don't want to?__ Tough shit.__ You're so annoying!__ What's wrong? Still mad that you have a rare ability to hear your inner thought?__ No, I'm pissed at you.__ Then let's chat like normal humans do.__ That's like talking to myself.__ Exactly! You're insane!__ Piss off.__ Really Sakura, what's up? Something's bothering you, or you wouldn't be arguing so loudly, you know, Neko's ability is pretty rare, we've seen it before though.__ Yeah, but Mo and Miji are also telekinetic, that's different, they're psychic.__ That matters very little; they still read your mind.__ Why are we talking about this?__ You won't talk to me otherwise._

"SAKURA!" Neko ran into the room, "Deidara's gone, I wasn't in the room for a minute and he disappeared." _That's really ironic.__ Piss off.__ I'm just saying, sheesh._

"what'll we do?" sakura asked, standing.

"well I was thinking one of us would leave but…" neko trailed off.

"what?" sakura asked.

"I have no idea which way he went."

"I'll try and find him."_ Good idea! How're you gonna pull that off dumbass?_

"How?"

"I'll find a way." Sakura gave a reassuring smile, trying to tell her inner thought to piss off. She quickly donned the Akatsuki cloak she'd been given, (and hadn't worn since they'd reached the Land of Waves) and left.

Two things tipped Sakura off that Deidara had, in fact, left the house were, 1. There was a blatantly obvious trial of blood, and 2. He was marking a trail in the first place with the heel of his shoe._ Nice going there Columbus.__ What's that supposed to mean?__ Just ignore me for now, focus on following the smartass's trail.__ What happened to him being nice?__ Who said I don't think that, he's just snarky and openly irritating._ Sakura stifled a laugh, she was getting used to having her inner self making open commentary already. She started to remember herself when she was a little girl.

_**Flashback**_

* * *

**Watch where you're going bitches!**_**Sakura jumped at the sudden speech in her head, cursing the three girls who'd almost run her over. **_**What's that?**** Hi there Sakura, 'bout time you started hearing me, I'm your inner thought.**** That's nice, go away.**** Aww, but I like you.**** I'm afraid of you!**** You'll get used to me, I'm always here.**

_**End Flashback**_

* * *

Sakura smiled to herself, the little girl version of her was a bit more terrified of her inner self compared to her as she grew up, now, along with Sakura's outer maturity growing, the sympathy of her inner self grew, and as did her irritation when talking to just Sakura. Sakura began following the trail, although Sakura hadn't really taken into account that Deidara would probably be moving ridiculously slow since he was bleeding. So after a few seconds she saw him half limping, half walking in a random direction. _He's stupid._

"Deidara," Sakura called out, not thinking clearly on the subject of what she'd even say. Deidara glanced back, obviously surprised.

"Oh, hi, hm," he said._ That's all? You're fucking bleeding to death and all you have to say is 'hi?'_ "Can you tell that voice in your head that I can hear it, hm?" Deidara asked, smirking slightly._ Wonderful, he can read minds. _**Can you shut up already? I'd think that was obvious.**

"Mo could do that," Sakura said, "don't do it again."

"Wonderful, ow," Deidara flinched and staggered.

"Maybe you shouldn't have walked outside at this point."

"Oh yeah? I was getting curious, hm."

"Stop getting curious." Sakura placed a hand lightly on deidara's side and released chakra, almost smiling when the light green glow appeared. She closed her eyes and listened as Deidara's breathing became less forced and less ragged. It slowed and Sakura opened her eyes to see deidara's eyes were closed. _He fell asleep. He's so cute when he's asleep.__ For once, I agree._

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**Aww! *hearts* that's so cute and touching! I'm totally insane! Yes, said inner thought is Inner Sakura. And yes, Mo is psychic and Neko is telepathic. The telepathic thing with Deidara was just something I had to scrawl down just to get Inner Sakura to shut up. Even when she was little Inner Sakura was snarky. The rabbit was a base off of Monty Python and the Holy Grail, you know, that evil white rabbit that tore people's throats out? Yeah, that, only it has black spots and a blue eye. "One, two, five…" "Three sir." "Three!" *chucks grenade* BOOM! LOLZ**

**Hidan: REVIEW PEOPLE! THE AKATSUKI PRINCESS IS EVIL! AND SHE SCREAMS LOUDER THAN ANYONE I'VE EVER MET!**

**Deidara: Hidan, shut up, hm.**


	6. Chapter 6:Evacuate the Dancefloor

Chapter 6: Evacuate the Dancefloor

**What? Can't I listen to modern music? I'm not much of picky music listener. Some songs I'll never listen to, but anything decent, I'll listen. A YouTube request for some pretty good music, Dustin Tavella, he's a local artist in my state (PA). So anyway, news update in my world: I'm part of my school's anime club, or at least, the HIGH SCHOOL anime club, the next meeting is cosplay day, and I've got an email accept to an interview for a project. So, yeah, whatever, read this fanfic to the end please! Thanks for being patient! And the answer to those two questions I asked in chapter 4: 1- It's pronounced "hee-dan," although it's normally incorrectly pronounced as "hi-dan." 2-Kaji and Hidan were friends in Yugakure until Hidan defected. And Kaji is an atheist. 3- The lamb bit was actually based off of neither, but Code Geass Viceroy Destiny, who is featured in my fanfics as Miyuki or Mari. So my new question is this: Who is Sourei based off of? The answer next chapter. Review!**

The week was finally over. And the hell of a mission, Kaji was dead and Sakura didn't have to do a thing except heal Deidara. She was way too lucky.

"Sakura," Tori came in wearing a black t-shirt with one normal sleeve on the left and one spaghetti strap on the right that reached her fourth rib from the bottom, a pair of dark blue shredded capris, and a black bandanna over her hair, which was down, "ready to go?"

"Oh, yeah," Sakura replied.

"Good," Tori smiled, "that dress suits you, kikan."

"Um, thanks," Sakura replied, looking at the strapless pink dress with a black skirt that reached her knees.

"Come on," Tori said, "I still need to get dressed, just get out to the entranceway, and hurry, kikan!"

"Okay," Sakura replied, walking towards the entranceway. _Why did I agree to a date?__ Because the guy who asked you is hot!__ Why are you back?__ You need me, admit it.__ I do not!__ Deidara's not gonna wear a tux is he?__ Why would he? Long hair looks stupid with just a tie._

"Nice dress, hm," Deidara said.

"Um, thanks," Sakura stammered.

"Sakura-chan is very pretty," Tobi smiled. Sakura smiled back at him, slightly weirded out by the fact that both, although wearing suits, neglected to wear a tie.

"I'm ready to go, kikan," Tori came out wearing her favorite dress and the same black bandanna; she held two pairs of shoes in her hands. The first was a pair of three inch heel black sandals, obviously Tori's, and a pair of heelless black sandals with a light pink rose on the outside heel of either (**A/N: By this I mean the side of the foot the little toe is on in the back near the heel**). Those were Sakura's.

The restaurant was extremely fancy (**A/N: I didn't mention this before, but they're date's at a restaurant, to be specific, it's an Belgian restaurant, which are actually famous for their waffles, mussels, fries, beer, and chocolate, the Belgians I mean**) and the fact that Tori had gone out of her way to make sure there were two separate tables just accented that she really wanted to make it an actual date and not just a dinner with friends. Sakura looked at the menu and lifted an eyebrow; this food was kind of weird. Deidara noticed Sakura's confused face and pointed at two selections on the menu.

"Those are the best foods on the menu, hm," Deidara said, "in case you were wondering."

"Oh, thanks," Sakura said. After ordering and finishing the main course, the waitress suggested that Deidara and Sakura split a dessert, which Deidara agreed to and they both agreed on some kind of chocolate cake.

"It's good," Sakura said, surprised.

"The country this restaurant's food is based off of is famous for this kind of food, and its beer, hm," Deidara said.

"You know a lot about food," Sakura said.

"Actually," Deidara laughed, "Mo knows more about food than anyone else, hm."

"Ah," Sakura was silent for the rest of the time in the restaurant. When they left a group of drunk shinobi were in the direction they'd just come from, so Deidara simply pulled Sakura into an alleyway. Sakura was wearing nice shoes, and Deidara had worn generic shinobi sandals, so he was walking faster than her, and of course his legs were longer. "Will you wait?" Sakura asked a bit too loudly. Deidara turned around and pulled her against a wall.

"Will you shut up?" he asked quietly, "you're being too loud, hm." As he said this, a pair of large young men in maybe their mid-twenties walked into the alley, and they were drunk. The one closer to the wall as they passed noticed Sakura and Deidara and brought this to his companion's attention.

"Lookit Hebereke," the first said, "a pretty girl and her date."

"Yeah Nomimono," the second said, "they might not be associated though." The one named Nomimono smiled evilly, and grabbed at Sakura. Deidara held a hand up to block him.

"Get out of here and leave her alone, hm," he said.

"Aww," the one named Hebereke slammed his fist into the wall above Deidara's head, "stop getting in the way brat, the girl's ours."

"Leave her alone, hm," Deidara repeated, moving in front of Sakura. Nomimono smirked and also pulled a fake punch, which collided with the wall beside Deidara's head, Sakura made a small squeak and ducked down.

"Get out of the way boy," Nomimono said, "it's be a shame to hurt a kid."

"Leave her alone."

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!" Hebereke slammed his fist into Deidara's face and knocked him into the wall, "IS THAT ALL YOU CAN SAY YOU LITTLE RAT?"

"Baka," Deidara snickered quietly.

"WHAT," Nomimono asked, "DID YOU CALL ME?"

"BAKA," Deidara looked up and smiled wide, "IDIOT."

"YOU LITTLE RAT!" Nomimono grabbed Deidara's collar and held him up, "I'LL DEMOLISH YOU!"

"TRY IT!" Deidara said. Nomimono threw Deidara into the wall and swung up his hand, then paused.

"Any last words little rat?" he asked.

"GO TO HELL!" Deidara screamed. At this point, Sakura was backing out of the alley. Nomimono brought his fist down into Deidara's stomach and Sakura ran. She kept running until she ran into a young teenage girl a year or so older than herself. Her hair was pitch black and her eyes were lapis blue, she was wearing a simple blue t-shirt and jeans.

"Where's the fire?" the girl laughed, then saw Sakura's terrified face, "oh god, where'd you come from? You look like you saw a mugging or something." Sakura pointed to the alley she'd just run out of. "Thanks so much," the girl said, "my name's Sourei in case you were wondering, Konpaku Sourei. What's yours?"

"Haruno Sakura," Sakura replied.

"Oh, you're part of the Akatsuki's regime, I've been trying to get into their ranks for years," Sourei smiled, "I'll be back in a sec." Sourei disappeared, fading into transparency. A few moments later, the two drunk men ran out of the alley screaming something about a ghost. Sourei emerged a few moments later with Deidara, who was walking on his own, and only had a few minor bruises.

"Back," Sourei said, "and your date's fine."

"Sourei," Deidara shoved Sourei over a few steps, "be quiet, or I'm not taking you to Leader-sama, hm."

"Really?" Sourei gave a happy smile, "for real?"

"Yeah," Deidara smiled back, "you really are useful, hm."

"I SO TOLD YOU!" Sourei screamed.

"Yeah," Deidara laughed, then he turned to Sakura, "you're okay right, hm?"

"Yeah," Sakura stammered, "fine." Deidara smiled and brushed stray hairs out of her face and bent down.

Long story short, their lips met. Sakura's eyes were open for around two minutes till she actually closed her eyes.

A few minutes later, the two pulled away. Sourei cleared her throat.

"Well, that was certainly uncalled for," she said, "but very cute, I will admit."

"Sourei," Deidara shot Sourei a warning glance.

"Shutting up," Sourei said.

**Okay… I didn't plan for Deidara to kiss her… Anyway, Nomimono and Heberake are just random guys I came up with, they appear again, and they're still drunk. Nomimono means "drink" and Heberake means "drunk." Sourei means "poltergeist" and konpaku means "soul," "spirit," or "ghost." Heberake was actually supposed to be the main mugger in the mugging scene, Nomimono was just supposed to hit on Sakura, but I ended up changing that. So my question, again, is: Who is Sourei based off of? Thanks for reading, review!**


	7. Chapter 7: In Too Deep

Chapter 7: In Too Deep

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**Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I don't own Naruto.**

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**Anyone who's interested, I need a Deviant Art artist to draw my OCs because Peeves won't do it for me and I don't know how to draw males, PM me or review this fanfic if you're interested. Okay, so Code Geass Viceroy Destiny threatened to ditch her fanfic if she doesn't get 10 reviews, she's really good. Even if you don't read Code Geass, please read her fanfic. So to answer the question I asked in chapter 6, it was Peeves. That's right, Sourei is Peeves, Kanpaku means ghost and Sourei means poltergeist. So Code Geass Viceroy Destiny wants me to star her in this fanfic since Tori stars in her fanfic, and I was planning on doing so anyway, she's just impatient. Also, last thing, I'm going to post a Soul Eater fanfic soon, read that please. Question: (This pertains to the fanfic and will be posted as a poll) What does a single thornless red rose signify? This poll will be on my profile, check it and I'll answer it next chapter. I'm working on a novel right now. By the way, announcement: I am now in 9****th**** grade. That does not mean you can hate on me like that jerk on my Naruto/Hogwarts Crossover. Okay, so R&R, thanks, and slight um…Itachi-OC pairing here, sorry, I love Itachi too, but he's just so sad alone.**

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"Sakura!" Miyuki slammed open the door, tugging at her hair, which was now in messy black ringlets, "Help me kill Itachi."

"Um," Sakura looked hesitantly at Miyuki, whose now cinnamon colored eyes glittered angrily, "what happened?"

"He freaking killed my Genjutsu!" Miyuki screamed.

"But you're pretty like that," Sakura said.

"You think so?" Miyuki released her hair, "I don't think so."

"Miyuki!" Tori walked into Sakura's room, "ah, Miyuki, your curls are back, and as pretty as ever, slightly messy, but pretty."

"Thanks Tori," Miyuki sighed, "when's mission time?"

"Two hours," Tori held up two fingers, "but, here's the problem, and you won't like this, kikan."

"What?" Miyuki asked.

"We're going after Sen," Tori said.

"I don't mind," Miyuki said

"No," Tori said, "you don't get it, we're doing this for Konoha, and their jinchūriki and a Jōnin are tagging along, kikan."

"WHAT!" Miyuki stood, "WHY?"

"Konoha found out about Sakura being here," Tori said, "to keep her, we have to drop hunting the jinchūriki and take out a criminal for them while working for him, kikan."

"And?" Miyuki asked.

"We agreed to everything except ending the hunts," Tori said, "you know how powerful the biju are? They could bring back humans who've passed on without exchanging a life; you know how important this is to me, kikan."

"So how'd we get them to agree?" Miyuki asked.

"Um," Tori fidgeted, "we told them we'd go after a different jinchuriki instead of him, kikan."

"Is there even another jinchuriki?" Miyuki asked.

"There's Mitsuki," Tori said, "the Jūbi's host."

"Oh, yeah," Miyuki said, "ice block girl."

"Okay," Tori slammed her hand into her forehead, "just, go, Miyuki, get ready, or, something, kikan."

"Later," Miyuki skipped out of the room and into hers.

"That girl will be the death of me," Tori said mournfully, "she's really nice, just, so, freaking, irritating, kikan."

"So," Sakura said, "you're not going after Naruto?"

"No," Tori sighed, "I'm actually glad we're not on this mission. I don't need to look at shinobi who are still loyal to their village. Sometimes, it makes me sort of guilty, kikan."

"Why?" Sakura asked.

"A full back story would bore you," Tori said.

"Fine," Sakura said, "when's breakfast?"

"BREAKFAST!" Hidan's voice screamed from the kitchen.

"Now," Tori said, "SAVE THE PUMPERNICKEL FOR ME BITCHES!"

"Okay," Sakura stood, Tori ran out of the room and into her room. Sakura shut the door and quickly changed into a pastel blue t-shirt and light khaki capris. Then walked out into the hall where Tori, wearing a black t-shirt, black bandanna, and indigo ripped jeans, was wrestling to get out of the door, which Hidan, shirtless and wearing jeans, was blocking her. For once, his hair wasn't slicked back, which made Sakura realize how messy it generally was, hair was hanging in his face and it was a wonder how he could even see.

"LEMME OUT HIDAN!" Tori screamed.

"Aww, how cute, you're so tiny," Hidan said.

"MOVE YOUR ASS BEFORE I MOVE IT FOR YOU DAMMIT!" Tori screamed.

"Okay, okay, sheesh," Hidan moved out of the way, Tori sprinted down the hall towards the kitchen, "she's so cute."

"You're mean," Sakura said.

"It's fun," Hidan said.

"Put a shirt on," Sakura said, shoving him out of the way. Hidan smirked, but his eyes were more upset, something was bothering him.

"Yo, 'sup mofo?" Hidan walked into the living room.

* * *

"Yo," Deidara said, "something bothering the Jashinist, hm?"

"How long are we keeping pinkhead?" Hidan slumped on the couch next to Deidara.

"Why?" Deidara asked.

"She's getting in my hair."

"I can see that, your hair's not slicked back, hm."

"What the hell?" Hidan slapped Deidara upside the head.

"I'm just saying, did you run out of hair gel or something, hm?"

"No, bet with Kakuzu."

"You were cute as a chibified little kid, hm."

"Itachi stalked me all week."

"That was actually funny, hm."

"What is he? A pedo?"

"No. Honestly, I'm not too happy about Sourei being here, hm."

"She's fine, why are you defending pinkhead?"

"Dunno."

"What? Did the date go well?"

"Um, I got mugged by a couple of your buddies, hm."

"Who?"

"Nomimono and his drunkard brother, Heberake, hm."

"Them? I hate those two, bastards."

"Huh. So you still upset about not being put on the Sen Mission so you're taking it out on Sakura, hm?"

"You could tell?"

"How long have we been friends again, hm?"

"Nine years."

"I can always tell."

"Whatever, hey, Itachi broke the Genjutsu on Miyuki, she's back to normal."

"Cool. Are we gambling again tonight?"

"Yeah. What game?"

"Dunno, it's Kakuzu's turn to choose. Please have it not be poker, hm."

"Why?"

"I never remember the rules, hm."

"Wow, Tori doesn't know the rules either."

"She made Itachi memory wipe the rules because the last time she played it was strip poker and she lost, hm."

"She's pretty."

"Girls don't like strip poker, hm."

"I like it."

"That's because you're a pervert, hm."

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"Why are all the guys so happy?" Sakura asked Tori later.

"Guess what Kakuzu chose for gambling tonight, kikan?" Tori said mournfully.

"What?"

"Strip poker," Tori said, "and newcomers have to play, so I'm playing, kikan."

"I don't know how to play poker," Sakura said.

"Join the club," Tori said (**A/N: I don't know the rules to poker, I'm going to skip this part and get to why I wrote strip poker into this chapter in the first place, because I'd never play it in real life**).

* * *

Sakura pulled a sundress over her head and walked out of her room. She walked down the hall quietly, trying to make as little noise as possible as she headed for the living room. In the living room, Deidara was asleep on the couch; his hair was in total disarray. Sakura looked at him and quietly went behind the vase for her t-shirt and capris, which she'd lost in the game of strip poker earlier that night.

"You're not supposed to do that until tomorrow morning, hm," two arms wrapped around Sakura.

"I thought you were asleep," Sakura said.

"I was," Deidara said, "you're really loud, vibration-wise, hm."

"Oh," Sakura turned as pink as her hair.

"Your hair's grown," Deidara twirled a strand of her now chest length hair. Sakura smiled and turned around to look at Deidara. She put her hands on his chest and stood on the tips of her toes to meet his lips with hers. As she did she felt Deidara weave a single thornless red rose into her hair.

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**Cliffhanger! So I finally got the DeiSaku elements in, and yes, Deidara doesn't usually sleep in his room, I have no idea why. Next chapter we're cleaning Hidan's room, it'll be funny, trust me. So answer the poll, it's on my profile. Deviant Art artists, PM me if you want to draw my OCs. I'll look at your work and announce the artist as soon as I can. R&R.**


	8. Chapter 8: Prince of Spades

Prince of Spades

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**Disclaimer: I really do wish I owned Naruto.**

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**Okay then! So just a shout out to anticollision, she totally inspired a line in this chapter. One of the most...err, disturbing, scenes in the next chapter was inspired by a weird dream I had (I need to stop eating honey chipotle barbeque sauce, it's just so good!). I have a weird mind. I decided that if I want to boost readers I'd better post more often and make my username shorter, so I'm going to post another poll in a few weeks (you need to look at these freaking polls people, one person so far has answered). So yeah, review, because anticollision had 50 reviews by chapter 4 and I still only have three! TT_TT I'll unblock anonymous reviews if you at least don't abuse me. BTW, I might be getting published! The story's this story about a circus and four girls, two gypsies and two performers; it's kind of a story of belonging and understanding. So, yeah, oh, and listen to Zoot Suit Riot by The Cherry Poppin' Daddies, it's a swing song that I made a scene in the next chapter with. OMG, this is in my head and I haven't watched YouTube all day! WHYYY!**

**The Amityville Toaster!**

**Make breakfast spooky!**

**Spooky talk from toaster!  
Spooky eat me toast!**

**Yum, yum, yum,**

**Human hand.**

… **I watched the real video for that… yeah, talking squirrels… ugh. Okay, begin reading. The title song is by Dispatch. This story will from now on be in first person so I can mess with people's heads and use Inner Sakura more, BTW, her name's now Naime (pronounced Nah-ee-meh), which is a shortened version of Naimenteki.**

**R&R FOR FREAKING GOD'S SAKE!**

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**Normal Text:**

**Author's Note**, Regular Text, _Outer Thought_, _Inner Thought_, **Sent Thought, POV**

**Flashback Text:**

**Outer Thought**, _**Regular Text**_, **Inner Thought**, _Sent Thought_

**Note: Author's notes are not used in flashbacks, only in regular texts, if a flashback is in the start of a chapter it isn't marked, otherwise it is.**

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Sakura POV:

"Sakura-chan!" a childish voice screamed as I was quickly glomped from behind.

"Augh!" I screamed, _real smooth Sakura-teme. __Can it weirdo. __I'm you.__ Really? You're nothing like me._

"Tobi wants to say hi!" the voice said, as the teen's small frame flopped down next to me, "And Tobi also wants to say that Sakura-chan is very pretty."

"Um, thanks Tobi," I said.

"Shouldn't you be going to hurt yourself Tobi, hm?" a familiar voice asked, I flipped over to see a really irritated Deidara.

"Senpai!" Tobi's face perked up even more, "your girlfriend's so pretty!"

"Tobi," Deidara gave Tobi a warning glare, "go bother Hidan for a bit, hm."

"But Hidan-sama wanted Tobi to walk off a cliff," Tobi said.

"Then follow his advice," Deidara said, "and make sure the cliff's tall, hm."

"You're so nice to him," I mused, flipping onto my side.

"You can tell?" Deidara smirked, "go find the Baka girls, hm."

"Okay Deidara-chan," I smirked back. I stood and skipped off, smiling to myself. By Baka girls, Deidara meant Tori and Hina, those two were usually together, more now than any other time. Suddenly, I stopped, _hey Inner.__ My name is Naime! Damn it!__ Whatever, but since when does Tobi bother Hidan before anyone else?__ He doesn't, Tobi wasn't lying though, wonder if Hidan's in a bad mood today?_ _I hope not…because if he is-_ my thought were cut short when Hidan shoved his way past me.

"WATCH IT BITCH!" he screamed. I flinched, backing up; Hidan looked pretty annoyed; something was bothering him.

"Hidan-Nii," a less annoyed, more exasperated voice called, "stop being a teme, please."

"Fuck you Omaku-chan," Hidan hissed, "and fuck you too Pinky." With that he stormed off.

"Well good morning to you too," I muttered, turning to thank Hina, but stopped cold, Hina's usually brightly colored hair was pitch black, as were her clothes, a t-shirt and a knee length skirt.

"Don't mind him," Hina said, trying to be cheerful, but her eyes shone with grief, "he's going to be like that today."

"Okay," I replied, not bothering to ask why. Hina gave a genuine half-smile and walked away.

"You're curious," a familiar voice, (in fact, one I just got screamed at by) said behind me.

"Whaa?" I turned around to see Hidan, who was less angry, more intrigued by me. _Mind reader! Shun! Damn it!__ Stop it, that's so mean. __I'm teasing, he can't read minds. He's too much of a son of a muffin.__ A muffin? __Yes, a muffin, a blueberry muffin to be exact.__ You're crazy. __Thanks!_

"Well?" Hidan said snapping me out of my argument with my inner thought, "Don't tell me you're not curious, it's written all over your face Pinky."

"Leave me alone," I said. _HEY! I happen to like Hidan-teme.__ I don't. __Teme, damn it._

"Sour much?" Hidan smirked.

"I'm not keen on talking to the person who cussed at me, TEME," I spat. Hidan scoffed. I turned my back to him.

"Hey," he said. I ignored him. "Hey," he repeated, "Pinky." Again, I ignored him. "YO PINKY!" he finally screamed.

"Okay what?" I screamed as I turned around, about to kill him, before I noticed that he didn't look intrigued, more terrified.

"Don't move," Hidan said, running a hand through my hair, he pulled out a pitch black spider with a red hourglass symbol on its back, a black widow spider. I screamed.

"Was that in my hair?" I asked, clearly terrified.

"Yeah," Hidan said, and then muttered something about killing someone, I didn't catch the name, and then he walked off. I felt the back of my head, two small bumps were present. Then I blacked out.

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Tori POV

I moaned and slumped on the couch between Tobi and Sasori. Sasori barely acknowledged my entrance, Tobi smiled briefly. I heard storming footsteps. _Here comes the hurricane._ I sighed and told myself to shut up as Hidan stormed in and stopped in front of Tobi.

"Explain yourself," Hidan held up a small black spider, "now Tobi."

"Tobi has no idea what you're talking about," Tobi held his two hands in an x-formation.

"Don't fuck around with me you little shit," Hidan growled, "everyone in this room knows that you're faking it, even that face, all fake."

"Tobi," I glared at the now smirking Tobi, "what the fuck did you do, kikan?"

"Nothing," Tobi snickered darkly, smirk changing to a maniacal smile.

"Don't play games you little fuck!" Hidan screamed, "What kind of sick twisted game are you playing at?"

"Just cleaning up a bit," Tobi said darkly, "do we really need two medic nin? Tori's just fine. She's the worse of the two, I don't want her around." **(A/N: sorry to all the people who thought I was going to keep Tobi as just Tobi, it's just that…ugh, I need a climax, and here it is.)**

"You know," Sasori said, standing, "I think Deidara would love to hear this, Madara." Tobi's (Madara's) eyes widened.

"You wouldn't," he hissed.

"I would," Sasori said, "Tori, go find Sakura, and hurry, I don't like the look of that spider." Madara smirked.

"It seems," he muttered as Hidan threw the spider onto the ground and crushed it, "that your eternal beauty can have some flaws, Sasori no Akasuna." I glared at him and ran out of the room.

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Deidara POV

"Yo," Sasori held up a hand, "so, you know Tobi?"

"Did the little fuck really go and jump off a cliff, hm?" I asked, not paying much attention to him and more to the mobile spinning in my room. Yes I have a mobile, don't ask, I was bored one day and I made a mobile for no apparent reason.

"Unfortunately for you, and Pinky," Sasori began, "no." I stopped at mention of Sakura in the same sentence referring to Tobi/Madara.

"Ah shit," I sat up, "what did that bastard do this time, hm?"

"Ask him," Sasori said, "and try to make sure he doesn't die, please."

"No promises," I said, leaving my room. _Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, not Sakura, please don't be dead, please._ I found Madara a few minutes later, in Tobi persona, chatting nonchalantly with Miji. The liar, he had a small spider clenched in his hands. Mo seemed to realize the danger, and was trying to pull Miji away.

"Miji, come on," Mo tugged at her twin sister, "please, stop it, please."

"It's just Tobi Mo-chan," Miji shrugged Mo off and smiled to Madara, who smiled cheerily back.

"Teme," I muttered. Madara caught a glimpse of me and seemed to smirk at me with his visible eye. "Goddammit," I hissed, then backed away.

"Nii-san!"

_Damn you Mo._ "Mo, get Miji out of here," I said, "now, hm." Miji looked at me with a confused look, but let Mo drag her away. Madara looked at me and smiled.

"You ruined my fun," he said. I growled and socked him in the face, hard.

"You fucking sorry piece of shit," I spat as he stood, "what did you do, hm?"

"I'm so sorry," Madara smiled, "but your little girlfriend isn't needed anymore."

"You little…" I swung my fist back to punch him again, but I stopped short, Madara was laughing.

"You're not very bright," he said, "I have to admit that I never thought that you'd fall for that freak of a girl." I narrowed my eyes.

"What's that supposed to mean, hm?"

"The girl is unnaturally strong, she thinks on two scales, and cannot see truth when it's right in front of her. You really think I was going to stay away from the Kyubi?"

"That wasn't the reason we recruited her."

"Her medical skills are weaker than Tori's, Tori isn't easily replaceable, that girl, on the other hand, easy to replace, Tori can replace her."

"You really don't get it, hm."

"Please don't be like this," Madara said, "I need the talent you possess, and I don't want to get rid of you. Furthermore, I understand that you love her, maybe you should fall for someone else next time."

"You just don't get it do you Teme?" a familiar voice said behind me, it sounded a lot like a darker version of Sakura.

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Naime POV

I smirked as Madara looked at me in utter shock.

"Oh yes teme," I said, "I can come out."

"Damn," Madara growled, "you're a self-defense Genjutsu."

"Oh, that explains it, hm," Deidara turned to look back at me. _No, chiz, Sherlock._ I smiled; Sakura really did fall for the weirdest people. Personally I always liked Naruto more, the dobe.

"Well," I shrugged, "you could say that, if you haven't noticed it, I don't exactly look like her." Honestly, I don't, dark brown hair and deep emerald eyes do not look like light pink hair and turquoise eyes.

"Hmph," Madara smirked, "think fast Naime." He threw a spider at me; it grew and bared its fangs.

"Think fast eh?" I smiled maniacally, "okay then." I stepped towards the creature, baring my teeth as well. The spider hesitated, not moving an inch. I smiled wide. "Spiders fear humans, no matter how small," I smiled wider and looked at Madara, "and you think he's stupid." I stepped forward and flipped out a kunai. "If I were to say sorry," I said, "I'd be lying, ta-ta Teme. Eat metal damn it!" I dug my kunai into Madara's stomach, he spit blood and collapsed.

"Nicely done," Deidara said, "name, hm?"

"It's Naime," I said, "pleasure."

"Um, like-wise, hm."

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**Okay people, 3 more chapters! Review please, it's almost over, I need to end this fanfic, I'm sorry I had to bring Madara into this, I didn't want to, I had no choice, sorry, sorry, sorry a million times! I killed him though. Teme, heh-heh, good one, Teme… Sorry, son of a muffin is copyright of anticollision, okay, check my poll, thanks! I'll see you guys ASAP. New crossover fanfic coming out in a few days or so! Take a look at my poll! Tuesday is unfortunately blank because of color guard, and I might not be able to get on tomorrow, sorry. Review, favorite, follow, yada, yada, yada. A big thank-you to strawberry030 for confirming the fact that Hidan needs to put a shirt on! Actually, he was wearing one in this chapter, I just didn't mention it. By the way, while reading an old fanfic, I realized thast I used to spell Madara, M-A-D-E-R-A and not M-A-D-A-R-A. That's a tad bit pathetic, I don't get it.**


	9. Chapter 9: Firew Burning

9. Fire Burning

**Erm…No clue. So this is the last chapter. I'M GONNA MISS YOU PEOPLE! Okay, so I must ask make a shout out to Code Geass Viceroy Destiny, who's Code Geass fanfic just ended. I actually knew the full ending to this. Scratch what I said last chapter, I deemed it too weird to write about. So, as this story comes to a close, I must say… THIS FREAKING FANFIC HAS BEEN FLIPPIN' AWAESOME! Also, I was given a shout out from Code Geass Viceroy Destiny, so I'm going to make a few shout outs in the end of this chapter. Okay, R&R.**

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Sakura woke with a start, she remembered all the events from before she blacked out, but she had absolutely no idea how long she'd been out.

"Sakura-chan!" a familiarly obnoxious voice yelled near her ear.

"Are you stupid? Not that close to her fucking ear you git!" another rather profane voice screamed. Sakura looked to her right to see Hidan rather aggressively strangling a familiar ball of blonde spiky hair in an orange jacket and pants, Naruto.

"Ack!" Naruto struggled spastically, serving as a source of entertainment for a brown haired girl curled up on the floor near them. I almost did a double take, the girl looked exactly like me facial-wise, other wise, she looked way different.

"Will you two stop being so immature, hm?" a voice on her other side said. Sakura's head whipped around to see Deidara slumped on the ground looking very irritated. Standing above him was a black hair boy Sakura almost mistook for Itachi, then she realized who it really was.

"S-Sasuke?" Sakura croaked out. Sasuke gave a brief smile of confirmation.

"Sakura," he said, "still weak I see." That stopped everything in the room. All eyes were on Sasuke, who seemed more smug than the last time Sakura had seen him.

"EXCUSE ME?" Sakura asked, her voice rising, "Weak? That's all you have to say? I haven't seen you in how long and you think I'm 'still weak? Are you fucking brain-dead?"

"Oh shit," Hidan started dragging the now shocked Naruto out of the room, "she's scary when she's angry."

* * *

Hidan pretty much dragged Naruto out of the room focused on Sakura, so he didn't see the approaching Tori, which he promptly ran into.

"What the muffins?" Tori shoved Hidan aside and looked at the doorway Hidan had just left, "Since when does the great Jashin immortal care what happens to someone else, kikan?" This was about the point where Hidan realized that he was dragging a stunned Naruto who was turning purple from lack of oxygen.

"What the fuck?" Hidan dropped Naruto, who gasped for breath. Now in Naruto's mind eye, Sakura was being normal, the brunette girl who looked like her was just plain evil, not saying the silver haired person was any better, he was just clueless. And last but not least, this new girl was drop dead gorgeous (**A/N: Naruto is seeing Tori for the first time, she was out on a mission since the day before Naruto and Sasuke came, so neither have met her yet**).

"So you had absolutely no clue that you were choking the poor guy, kikan?" Tori asked, looking very exasperated.

"Nope," Hidan replied, "no clue."

"Idiot," Tori moaned, "so Sasuke-teme pissed Sakura-chan off I take it, kikan."

"Yup," Hidan nodded. Tori sighed and looked at Naruto briefly.

"Tori," she said, pointing at herself, "that's my name, kikan."

"Okay," Naruto managed to say. Tori smiled and walked into the room where Sakura was in.

* * *

Sasuke looked at the door of the room as a short brunette entered. She looked familiar; he couldn't place her appearance though.

"What the bloody hell is going on in here?" she asked sharply, "I leave for three days on a mission and when I get back Hidan's strangling the fucking jinchuriki trying to get the fuck out of this room. Furthermore, what the hell is the bloody son of a muffin doing in here? I thought I told Leader-sama to lock the bloody door, kikan."

"He did," Deidara said, "the alleged 'bloody son of a muffin' got in anyway, hm."

"Great," the girl said, "so muffin-teme, do you have any clue who I am, kikan?"

"No," Sasuke lied, "and I really don't care." The girl stepped forward and Sasuke's head jerked to the side as a sharp pain flared up on the right side of his face. (**A/N: no shit, Tori slapped the teme!**)

"You have gall," the girl hissed, "to lie straight to my face, kikan." Sasuke snapped his head back to glare at her, something he was good at. The girl glared back, she was just as good at shooting death-glares, if not better. "Tell the truth," she hissed.

"I only recognize you," Sasuke replied. The girl shook her head and walked out.

"If you want to live another day, leave now," the girl said, "Trust me, kikan." Sasuke looked at her for a few more minutes, then walked out of the room after her.

"Sakura," Deidara looked at her, "you're being given a choice in the matter of staying here or not, hm."

"I'll stay then!" Sakura said, "Why do they want me to choose?"

"Because of what happened," Deidara explained, "the mission does nothing if you don't want to be here, hm."

"I do!" Sakura said, "If it's my choice I should be able to choose!"

"Well," Deidara laughed dryly, "tell Tsunade that tomorrow and we'll be fine, hm."

"Tomorrow," Sakura paused, "I have until tomorrow to give a legitimate reason to stay here?"

"Yes," Deidara said, "and I can't be a reason, hm."

"Why not?"

"Because I highly doubt you being in love with an S-rank criminal in more than 10 different countries justifies as a reason, hm."

"It justifies better than anything else I can think of."

"Right, sure."

"Get out!"

"Yeesh, cranky is we?"

"Just leave and take her with you." Sakura pointed to the brunette who was now watching their argument with a lot of interest.

"Lovebirds," she mused, "so hilarious."

"Okay Naime, out," Deidara began pushing the brunette for the door, which was pretty much working, since he was leaving too.

As soon as they were gone, Sakura leaned back and closed her eyes, heaving a large sigh. _What am I going to do? They all expect me to have a good reason, and I have none._ Sakura thought about things she liked about living there. There was the fact that almost all of them could cook well, which was more to say for her parents, who liked getting take-out for dinner. There was also that she never felt alone. Even when she was alone, she knew if she needed it she'd have someone to turn to who'd understand her. Sakura held back a sob; she didn't want to leave, more than anything she felt like she belonged here.

"That works," a voice startled Sakura. She turned to see Mo standing on the doorway.

"What do you mean?" Sakura asked.

"If you feel like you belong here, I'm sure Tsunade-hime will understand," Mo said.

"Are you sure?"

"I'm sure, trust me."

* * *

Sakura stood and looked at the small wooded clearing outside the hideout, possibly for the last time.

"I TOLD YOU IT WAS MY FREAKING MUFFIN!"

"LAST CALL MY FUCKING ASS!"

"WILL YOU TWO SHUT UP?" Sakura glared at Tori and Deidara, who were arguing about a muffin. The two of them stopped and looked at her.

"Okay," they said in unison. Sakura sighed and looked back at the front of the clearing. She stood there and waited until she saw Tsunade approaching.

"Tsunade-Shishou!" Sakura called, Tsunade smiled to see her old student running towards her.

"Sakura," she said, smiling like she usually did.

"Should we go?" Tori whispered to Deidara.

"For now," he replied, pulling her into the hideout.

"It's so good to see you again," Sakura said, hugging her teacher.

"Sakura," Tsunade's voice was soft, which was rare, "are you sure you want to stay here?"

"Yes," Sakura said, "it's the first time I've felt like I belong here. The people here believe in me enough, not too much and not too little." Sakura looked at her teacher almost desperately. Tsunade sighed, she understood how her student felt, Sakura wanted more than anything to belong somewhere, and it seemed impossible for her in the village she was born in. People belong in different places; it was possible Sakura belonged here. Even if it seemed unreliable to place her in the hands of criminals, Tsunade wanted her student to be happy, and this day was coming sooner or later, the day they had to part ways. The day Sakura made her own path.

"Alright," Tsunade smiled, "are you sure you belong here?"

Sakura paused and turned around to watch Deidara and Tori, again fighting about who called the last muffin and whether it mattered or not.

"Yes," Sakura said, "I think I belong here."

"Well," Tsunade smiled, "alright." Sakura, content with that answer, walked inside the hideout, Tori and Deidara, no longer fighting, looked at Tsunade.

"You're not letting us off the hook that easy is ya Hime-sama, kikan?" Tori asked.

"No," Tsunade said, "take care of my student; think you two can handle that?"

"abso-bloody-lutely," Tori smirked.

"Yup," Deidara smirked. Tsunade glared at them then walked away. Tori smirked.

"She's scary, but I like her, kikan," Tori mused.

"You're crazy," Deidara said, "oh, and the muffin was still mine, hm."

"Bullshit it was so mine!" Tori yelled. Deidara laughed and ran into the hideout with Tori hot on his trail.

* * *

**I added to the ending, but yeah, there ya go, Sakura will remain in the Akatsuki, I'm done writing chapters. Thanks for reading! I'll miss you people! Read the rest of my fanfics please! Some shout outs:**

**anticollision**

**Code Geass Viceroy Destiny**

**SaturnXK**

**nrules**

**violentblosson**

**OtakuPeople**

**KuRaI-BlOsSoM**

**strawberyy030**

**Thanks to all of you!**


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